Where to Start?

I sit around sometimes and I have all these Great things I would like to Blog about.... then my little scattered brain finds other things and I am off in another direction. Usually I find Face Book.... I like to read about other people from school... and friends at work, and my family scattered all over the United states. I love to look at family photos. I look forward to reading the blogs I follow on here too.



One thing I have a hard time with is when people tell me how beautiful Andrew is and why don't we have another baby? This is the one question that makes ME cringe. In reading a blog recently, it made me think of the thing that makes me cringe. I would have loved another baby... and a lot of times my heart aches for just one more. It's very hard for me to see so many of my friends having baby #2, or even number 1. Now, don't get me wrong, I am happy for them all, I don't want to come across as a jealous snot... it's just hard. My husband has 2 children from a previous marriage. Sometimes when you have a family that comes with kids.... the other family is not as welcoming in more kids (this is what I have experienced). The ONE child I got, was my miracle baby. I never knew that until 2004 when I Had a surgery done to see why my female insides were not functioning properly... come to find out, I Had so much scar tissue from Endometriosis, one of my ovaries was pinned down and probably not functional. Getting pregnant with Andrew was a gift from God to me... he's my miracle baby. My husband always wanted to "wait until Megan was 18", then for us to have a baby. Just to let you all know, Megan will be 18 in June 2010. I had a hysterectomy in July 2005. Had I waited.... had Andrew waited... I would have no baby. God knew I needed to have Andrew when I did.... it was in his plans for me. I know every day I am blessed when I see my little boy. I think back to tims in the beginning, certain people said to my husband, "You don't need another kid... you got 2 already", and that hurt me... I had a precious baby growing inside of me, healthy and perfect. And now that he is here he's loved but always on the back burner in a lot of ways... I love him more than anything. Having a child is a whole new way of seeing love. I Never know I could love somebody so fast and so hard, as I did when I saw my baby boy looking up at me at 5 minutes old. I felt so blessed the first time I saw him on an ultrasound, I was 7 weeks pregnant barely... I saw his little heart fluttering away - The most amazing sight and sound, filled my heart with love. I was officially a MOMMY.

I am officially now a GRANDmommy. I know MIchael is my my biological son, but to me, Rylee is my Granddaughter, and Andrew, is "Uncle Andrew"... something he doesn't like... he said he's too small to be an uncle. Rylee adores him... and his every move. She will be a year in March, where does time go? My baby is 8. My husband and I will be married 10 years on February 26th, 2010. I know I am truly blessed. We have had a rough 2009 but I have a feeling 2010 will be GREAT....

Maybe I can eve get on here more. I know certain people on here do Inspire me. Thanks Ashly :)

More soon!  (P.S. Am I missing the spell check on here?  I can't find it anymore??  So please excuse any errors ; )



Rylee Alexa 10 Months

And our new Baby.... Spencer Hutchings

Christmas.....

Where do I start? Christmas time and the holidays in general, have always been a difficult time for me. Well, let me rephrase that... I think after I got older and stopped staying with my father for Christmas, I truly started to miss that BIG family gathering I got so used to. It was how predictable things were - The Buffalo Snow, seeing my friends again.... a warm toasty fire in the fire place... seeing the HUGE Christmas tree my dad got every year (sometimes so big he had to tie it to the stairs, and my aunts and uncles on my dad's side and of course my Grandpa O'Brien. My grandfather was a big tall man, and he had an "iron finger" he loved to tickle us with... but it hurt more than tickled. = ) I never told him. He passed away in November 2007 - and this year, as with every year, I pulled that ornament out of the box and hung it on my tree. A picture of me and him, the last time I saw him, on his 85th birthday. It's hard to look at for me and I usually start crying, the same way I do when I pull my dear friend Luann's ornament out. She died from lung cancer, I saw her last in march on my 30th birthday - she died almost 4 months later. I never really got to sat goodbye - I wish I could let that out of my mind, but it is hard for me.... I guess the same way I never got to say goodbye to my grandpa. Now my Grandma Lucy has the beginnings of Alzheimer's... They say dementia, but my mom and I agree it seems much worse. My grandma always cooked, now my Grandpa does. She lost interest. She forgets where the washing machine is, he has to watch her constantly. I miss the way my "grammy" used to be... I wish she was well again. It breaks my heart and it warms my heart to see all that my grandfather does for her. They have been together over 60 years, married. It's true love and commitment to see him take care of her - making sure she is safe every minute of the day.

This Christmas has been a little harder than most - my husband and I Have been through a lot this year, the past few months have been especially hard - my main goal is to make sure my little boy has a good Christmas morning.... seeing his little bright blue eyes shine when he wakes to see what Santa has left him, brings joy to my husband and I. We have tried to buy things along the way. This will be our first Christmas that we don't have presents for each other and it makes me sad. But then I remember it's my little man that we are concentrating on and I am thankful I have my family. And also thankful we have a new addition to our family too.... Baby Rylee.

MERRY CHRISTMAS 2009

Terry

Time.....

Did you ever notice how a certain smell or a song can trigger a memory from years ago? I was sitting at work today and a song came on the radio - it immediately brought me back to early winter of 2002 when my baby was still a baby. It brought me back to the cool temps outside, and what the trees and sky looked like. It made me remember how sweet and innocent my little man was sitting in his car seat in the back of my car. I see him now, just starting 2nd grade.... joining the Cub Scouts... and searching the "Ga Radar" daily to track the late summer storms of Georgia, or the hurricanes brewing off in the ocean. I take great pride in all of his accomplishments. I love the way he loves to learn. I love his sweet kisses and hugs he is always willing to give me. I love the way he says "Daddy"... Minus the "D" sound... so it sounds more like "da-ee".... He cracks me up when he tells you a story and says, "And you know what?" (10 times) until you say "What".... then he goes on. I wonder if 7+ years from now I will hear a song on the radio and remember these hot summer days and his little stories and "You know what?!".... and think back of how fast time goes by. Having a child really makes you stop and think of how fast time can go by and to take notes and remember small details. You cannot get those little details back.... so enjoy them while you can.... or wait until that special song comes on the radio, and you can smile and think, if only for a moment, back to that special day.

New Post... Old Post....

I had a post yesterday that I archived which was entitles "Making Macaronis and memories". I always type these blogs then decide to hold them.... Why I do that I have no idea. Anyway.... today a dear sweet neighbor of mine was literally "Kicked" out of her home. She's in her 70's and has been a part of my life since 2000. She always had me in for coffee and conversation. Her long time friend passed away nearly 3 years ago. Although they were never married they knew each other a lifetime. She took care of him faithfully as his health failed him. She thought, he was making sure she would be taken care of. He did a reverse mortgage.... and left her name OFF the home. Now Fanny Mae wants her home and her money. Juanette moved out today leaving her key in the door and her tears on the porch. They are coming tomorrow to "throw her out". But they have no idea she's already moved. It makes me so mad they won't help her. It broke my heart as she drove out of my driveway and told me she loved me. It took all I had not to drop and cry. Even though she is not far away and I can go see her - it's not the same as walking next door and seeing her in her kitchen. Juanette was like having my grandmother right next door. She loves plants and birds.... she loved gardens and the outdoors. I loved listening to her stories of her kids, her mom and her family. We looked at pictures, shared laughs and smiles.

I'm gonna miss my neighbor... Screw you Fanny Mae. Juanette's name is on half that trust and they can't sell it w/ out her signature. Let's see who gets the last laugh here.....

Over and out.....

Me

Gone but not forgotten

I am referring to myself and this blog. I visit here quite frequently... but I never seem to leave my own thoughts and reflections. I lay in bed at night and I think of all the things I want to put in here. Then I fall asleep.... Like tonight... total blank.

A few things:

1) Kali had her baby - Rylee Alexa, March 17th. I am in love. Just call me "Grams"

2) Okay maybe just ONE thing...... because I forget the other things....

Okay.... stay tuned... I promise things will be more entertaining in the future.

I'll leave you with a pic of Rylee...



It's hard to believe you can love somebody you only just met... Instantly.

Movie night with my "friends"....

Okay - so I am trying to think of where to begin with this blog tonight. I have so many things that happened within a time span of 1 hour and 37 minutes (give or take a few minutes for "interruptions"). To start with, my mom made her way up to my home in Cartersville tonight, for dinner and a movie. I got "Nights in Rhodanthe" from NetFlix, and seeing that her and I are both Richard Gere fans... we were both excited. From the beginning... I never got to watch the movie completely..... Andrew's "relax" radar went off and he popped on in the living room and into my lap. All 63 pounds of him. "Rub my back..... rub my belly.... NOT that way.... that tickles...", and so on. Then he proceeds to pick up to small WebKinz that I got for my birthday, from him, and places them on both my shoulders. "These are your friends mommy...". Okay.... if I can get peace... they can be my friends. My mom starts to laugh. I am sitting in this recliner, w/ a serious face TRYING to watch the movie, with 2 stuffed animals on my shoulders. Again... I just want peace. Okay so fast forward a few more minutes of constant interruption and I pause the movie and tell Andrew "Mommy and her friends want to watch this movie...". He rolls over, faces me and tells me with a straight face, "Mommy, your friends aren't real.... they're stuffed."

Crazy.... party of one...... Crazy

Okay.... so after Andrew is whisked away by my husband, my mom and I resume our movie. We got to watch a good bit alone. Towards the end, my husband joins us. Apparently, this was a good time to check his blood pressure, which is a constant source of worry.. for him. Did I mention how LOUD the Velcro is on the blood pressure cuff?

**ssssssssssssccccccccccccciiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiippppppppppp**.

This is the noise we hear during a pretty intense time in the movie. My mom and I look at each other.

This noise is followed by a.... "Mmmmmmmmmmmmmrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr", the sound of the machine starting it's blood pressure checking. Mom and I glance at each other again, then at Doug. He's clueless....

5 minutes later..... the movie is getting more intense and SERIOUS.... I am actually tearing up.

**Sccccrrrriiippp* (adjustment of the blood pressure cuff)

**Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr**

This happens 1 more time.... followed by, "135..... I guess that's as LOW as it is going to GO...". *siiiiigh*

**STOP** Okay. Doug checks his blood pressure.... and when he checks it, he sits SUPER stiff and checks it over and over. The more he thinks about it, the higher it is going to go. I Know this.... but he thinks sitting there checking it, because he is SITTING.... it's gonna go lower. Did I mention he's been smoking all day.... had a few beers.... Oh and he's sitting there STIFF as a board? Well he is and he HAS.

**Sssssccccccrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiippppppp**

The movie is sad and I am crying....... very serious movie..... very emotional. Out of the blue, "It must be cold there, she's wearing a sweater and long pants".

I love my husband...... so..... random, and clueless. Mom and I are crying laughing at this point.

So in the span of an hour and 37 minutes.... my mom and I had the BEST night. She told me she was glad she stayed. Never a dull moment at my home... NEVER.

Did I mention the "Horse ball"? That's a story for another day.... one maybe my mom can tell.



My "Friends"

The TOOTH....

We all know me..... we all know how I am. I lose stuff constantly... I get agitated easily.... I am severely unorganized, but in some ways, severely organized. I feel sorry for plants in a department store left to die... I LOVE babies. I cannot accomplish ONE task at a time I start about 5 to 9 and do them all at once here and there. I hate cooking. I love my friends... These are some of the things that make me... ME. Which brings me to the story I am about to tell you..... One other thing is, I cannot stand to hear my son cry. My husband though.... loves to make him squeal. Andrew has a loose tooth. People who know me know that my son has what we call "The million dollar mouth". He's had fillings and crowns... he's never lost a tooth... we have had to have them all pulled, the new ones grow in and the old ones never get loose enough. He has a tooth now that is loose, on the bottom. He hates to have it touched or messed with. My husband believes all teeth should be wiggled and PULLED. I never let him do it. Last weekend he wrestled him down and tried to wiggle the tooth... it was a fight and afterwards Andrew comes into the kitchen where my mom and I are painting. My mom asks him what's wrong and he states, "Nanoo.... I just can't talk about it right now". So....Tonight, I left for some time AWAY, w/ a friend to Wal Mart (I know.... I know... Wal Mart??). Upon my return (which was no longer than 30 minutes), I was greeted at the door by my red-faced, watery eyed son. And the next thing I hear is, "Daddy made me fro-up, on the carpet mommy.... right there". Apparently, the tooth wiggling started the minute I left. Andrew got more than upset, started crying and coughing and, well... you know the rest. Needless to say, he was horrified. I can venture to say, I doubt I will be going anywhere alone for a while. I can also say Andrew thinks he can no longer eat Honey Nut Cheerios, thanks to the puke episode. Andrew already eats very little... I hate to think another item has been knocked off the menu. I was also notified that in case of another emergency, Andrew needs me on speed dial.